(Note: this blog was written 3-4 weeks ago) I updated my Facebook status about Stella's upcoming birthday. She will be 2 in less than a week. I clearly understand I'm not the first mother to mourn a child's upcoming birthday...but it doesn't make it any easier. I want so badly for her to be little for just a little bit longer. It goes by so fast I fear that so many moments were somehow "missed" or looked over or what have you. Is this rational? No? Could it be my raging hormones from nursing Mary Tucker? Quite possibly. Mary Tucker....that's another blog post. 4 months old??!!
But anyway, back to Stella...
This is Stella at 20 weeks - the exact age Mary Tucker is right now.
This is Stella at her 1st birthday party
I know it doesn't get any easier with each passing birthday but I wish I could just enjoy her turning 2 and growing up without the sad feelings of "where did my newborn Stella go...where did my baby Stella go?"
She is such a delight, that Stella girl. She just finished her first Mother's Day Out program at a nearby Episcopal Church/School and we cannot say enough good things about her teacher, Mrs. Patricia AKA "Patrishua". Stella love love loved school and her friends. She'd come home after each MDO saying everyone's name and her teacher's name, even the teach who left after Easter. Among the many comments that Mrs. Patricia would write on her progress note that she sent home, my favorite is the one where she basically said Stella like's eating her friends' lunches. Oops. Everyone else had been in the class (with the exception of our friend Gray) since the fall, so they knew how to sit in their seat and eat lunch. Stella...not so much. She was thinking it was more like Picadilly where you walk around the table and pick and choose what you want. Hey, Stella...I don't blame you. Sometimes I'd like to double up on some Picadilly's fried okra and mac n cheese and I still like to share other people's food, much to your Daddy's dismay.
At 23 months, Stella:
- weighs 29lbs - her friends that are all relatively the same age (some bdays in July/August) weigh 25lbs, 26lbs, 27lbs...nuff said
- is quickly learning how to run...her PT says this is a 2 yr old skill and not to be worried if she still isn't running after her 2nd bday because she still needs a few more months of walking to work her way up to running
- counts to 10 and speaks in mostly complete sentences - the child is a genius, I tell you. We always joked when Stella was still only crawling that she was so smart she didn't need to walk. She is a talking machine and always has been. Her newest phrase is to say she loves or likes something that she wants -
- "Mommy I like Dora! Watch a show, watch a show?" - turn on my damn show, Mom
- "Mommy I love pants! Try on the pants?" - change my clothes now, woman
- "Nuggets? Nugggggets? Nuggggggets?" - this doesn't need a full and complete sentence...she wants chicken nuggets NOW. And don't think about talking about chicken nuggets in front of her unless you have at least 2 chicken nuggets in your hands ready to feed her. She will repeat these words at an increasing volume until she nears hysteria. This was especially prominent a few weeks ago...I recently got her McDonalds chicken nuggets (which I thought would be the Mecca of chicken nugget-dom) and she would have nothing to do with them.
- "More cakes and waffles?" - obvi gimme some pancakes (AKA cancakes) immediately
- "Sissy crying? Sissy sad? - this is especially funny because whenever I ask her anything about her sissy, she responds "Sissy crying? Sissy sad?" We went through a colicky stage from 6-12 weeks with Mary Tucker and she was "crying" and "sad" most of the time. Stella quickly picked up on this and we'd tell her that Sissy was ok, she was just crying or sad. So when MT would play with Stella we'd ask her questions about Sissy playing with her toys and Stella would respond "Sissy crying. Sissy sad". We'd laugh and say "Not yet, Stella...but probably soon!"
- is pretty picky about food at this age. She used to eat anything I'd give her, but she prefers waffles, milk, applesauce, oatmeal, hotdogs, green beans, oranges, grapes, goldfish, cheese, and chicken nuggets. Occasionally she'll eat corn and carrots.I admit we've fallen into a rut of "easy foods" to prepare and haven't been very colorful, but I'm hoping to change that soon, especially since Mary Tucker will start to eat homemade fresh baby food soon.
I continue to work on savoring the "moment" and living in the "now" because I constantly run into people who comment on my beautiful children and say "enjoy it now...they grow up so fast" with a look of sadness in their eyes. I now understand this pain that lingers in the back of their minds...it's physically painful to watch them grow up and need you less and less. They are fully dependent on you for such a small fraction of their life, though during the tough times of little sleep, crying spells, accidents and tantrums it seems as if you'll never be anything but covered in vomit and perpetually sleep deprived. I have to remind myself to slow down...stop worrying about getting "there" in time, working for extra play money, picking up after a seriously intense play session, etc...I admit, I lose track...I lose focus on my children...I get caught up in the mundane unfun activities of reality. Here's an open prayer that we all slow down a little and breath in the sweet scent that is our life.
